What New Year’s Resolution??

•January 2, 2012 • Leave a Comment

Please take a minute and read my original, unedited New Year Resolution article I wrote for What’s Happening Magazine, then tell me what you think.  Happy reading!

_____________________What New Year’s Resolution??_____________________

I’m not one to make New Year’s resolutions.  In fact, I’ve never made a single one.  I think of them as a mere tradition in which people set goals with no real intentions of commiting and we all can agree we still get a bit squirmish whenever the “C” word is thrown around, especially if the outcome doesn’t involve sex or a prenup.
I mean, how many of you have ever gone to a 4th of July BBQ and overheard someone say, “nah, I’ll stick to just one turkey burger, please_oh, and let’s skip the bun_I’m trying to keep that New Year’s resolution going.  Will you pass the Michelob Ultra?”
I think there should always be a time and reason for improving one’s sel.  I, for one, have accomplished a few things that I’m pretty proud of without having felt the “commitment” that is associated with the need of a new beginning.  For example, back in 2006, I quit smoking after almost 10 years.  If I recall correctly, it was during the summer and there was an approaching pool-party wheere I wanted to show-off a set of new-and-improved pecs as well as a new swimsuit.  Of course, the real reason was because I was having a hard time breathing during my bench presses.  Regardless what the real push behind it is, the important thing is to have a motive in order to commit.

I also rememeber once, decididng to cut bread out of my diet.  Boy, was that fun.  Again, during the summer and before a pool-party, I’m sure. That lasted about a few years, but add that along to having just quit smoking and you got yourself a miserabe, cranky individual who survived only on albacore tuna and unsalted crackers.  AND, to top it off I refrained from attending ANY Holiday gatherings for the fear of embarassing myself by tearing uo the dessert table once I stood before it.
On a recent self-improvement kick, I promised myself (well, my BF Glenn) that I’d stop drinking for a week because he felt I was, his words: “abusing the bottle” a little much.  I told “that’s just ridiculous” and I added that that’s how I deal with “stress from work”.  I kept that promise and succeeded, but he didn’t have to remind me twice when the week was over.  In no time, I was back to my normal, happy self!
One thing I DID tell myself I’d do at the beginning of 2012_and by doing so I had set it free into the Twitter universe_ was that I would start to put my thoughts and ideas into words and jot them down.  I wasn’t clear whether it would be in form of a diary, notebook, or perhaps a Hollywood screenplay and my story would soon make it to the big screen starring that little kid from Modern Family.
Well, that hasn’t happenend yet, but I did, in fact, start my very first blog AND I got more involved in the contributing process of writing for this fine piece of reading material you are currently holding in your hands.  Granted, due to my field of “expertise”, I was always summoned to write for the WHM Nude and Swimsuit issues because I was told these would one day become Collector’s items and valuable.  Plus, I saw it.  and still do, as a stepping stone for a future memoir or perhaps a biographical comic strip!
You may already know, as we enter 2012, we are also entering the year of the DRAGON.  And if the name isn’t enough to smack you on the side of your head and make you think of FEARLESS, ADVENTUROUS and, God forgive me: FIERCE, then girl, you need to put this magazine down and serve yourself a double-shot of ambition!
Hello?  What better year to be all those and then some?  I mean, if we believe the Mayan Calendar, we don’t have much time left.  Yes, I’m aware writing a book, or rather a blog, isn’t necessarily a valiant way to ring in the New Year but hey, gimme a break!  This coming from a boy who’s Father once bet his other straight son $100 if he ever caught me with dirty hands for more than 5 minutes.
So, since everything I have ever written in 2011 will eventually en up in the debris that will supposedly become of 2012, I have decided to take a page from Glenn’s book (no pun intended) and live life more adventurous and DREAM BIG!  Well, realistically at least.  Unlike Glenn, I may not live to experience a safari/bunjee jumping trip to New Zealand anytime soon and frankly, I’d rather leave this world with dignity and prefer not to poop my pants if, in fact, this is the last year I’ll be around.
Plus, I still have a shit-load of petty stuff I would like to check-off my bucket list.  Although they may not be at the caliber of a resolution, perhaps I will finaly decided what I would want as my first and last tattoo.  How about that longing desire to go platinum?  The ladder may be a little age-inappropriate for me, but who gives a fuck!
Oh, and by the way, I’m not one to curse a lot.  It irks me when someone is a compulsive swearer, especially when its a woman, which, I know is a double standard but, blah blah blah.  I still use “fudge” instead of “fuck” and “shoot” instead of “shit”, but at this point, who gives a flying rat’s ass?  It comes with my goal of being stern and outspoken, which I failed to mention earlier, is my very firt (and perhaps last) 2012 “resolution”, if you cust call it that. Anyway, it’s not like you’re going to live to see me in 2013 and say “see that guy walking over there?  He’s the sternest, most outspoken guy I have ever met AND he’s not afraid to throw an F-Bomb!”

Anywho, enough about me.  What will be YOUR 2012 New Year resolution?


I also invite you to go to the magazine’s site and check out the entire issue dedicated to the New Year and new beginnings at:



“B.’s Beauty Shop” starring BEYONCE, RIHANNA, LADY GAGA & RUPAUL

•November 21, 2011 • 1 Comment


No Skeletons In This Closet: The CLUB PAPI Years

•November 10, 2011 • 8 Comments

If you knew me a few years back, you’d remember me in the latin gay circles as a Go-Go dancer of the popular, California-based, CLUB PAPI party circuit.  I use the term “dancer” lightly, because we never plied or sashayed our way across Madison Square Gardens, but we sure as hell ran every Gay Pride’s latin-tent on the West Coast.  LEO, CISCO, QWEST, DANIEL HERMOSILLO and myself, as well as a list of revolving members (BERNIE, ALEX, XAVIER…), and not to mention singing, drag-diva extraordinaire, MISS LOLA, got the crowd hot n’ heavy via gyrating hips and booty poppin’.

A'team from left to right: Leo, me, Qwest, Cisco and Hermosillo

As a member of CLUB PAPI we’d dance on any stage, box or bar around the country promoting the “gay latino scene”.  The title of strictest “dress code” by far is held by the bars in San Jose, CA while the raunchiest (or non-existent) are in the club’s dark rooms of Tijuana, MX.

We toured with latin artists such as LA INDIA and GLORIA TREVI, as well as 90’s acts reaching for that “last hurrah” via their throwback anthems like ROBIN S, CRYSTAL WATERS, and ROZALLA and recent one-hit wonders such as KAT DELUNA.  We were constantly mistaken for boy band members, regularly got free cocktails on flights and there were even talks of a reality show, aptly titled BOYS ON BOXES.  We were the self-proclaimed “ATEAM” – a title I would soon despise having partially coined for it created a barrier between the rookies and The Experienced.  Yet they knew better.  People wanted to either be us, bed us, or throw drinks at us.  Despite the bad rap, partially due to the behind-the-scenes in the dressing rooms, it was an exciting chapter of my life.

I bring-up this stage in my life because-aside from this month being my third year of “retirement” – recently, while at a friends apartment, after showing him GLENN’S music video for “LOVE DANCE” followed by CAZWELL’S “ICE CREAM TRUCK”, we somehow stumbled across old footage from my good ol’ CLUB PAPI days.  Some of the moments required more selective memory than others but I was nicely surprised to see how comfortable I seemed to be in my own skin.

Left to right: Cisco, Saul, Qwest and myself

CLUB PAPI dancers most of the time consisted of DANIEL HERMOSILLO, an Original, with the catchier nickname “BIG BOOTY DANIEL”.  CISCO, another Original-favorite who’d fly all the way from Denver and constantly promoted his website, CISCO’S BOYZ, and brought most of the attention.  The faintly aloof, always destined-to-greater-things, MIKE, a.k.a. QWEST, who wowed the crowd with mad sarong skills, and LEO, my white-washed Mario Lopez-stunner BFF who was my roomie, the life-of-the-party, and the  obvious nucleus of the five of us.

As a member of CLUB PAPI, when we weren’t flying coach, we had the “perks” of traveling almost every weekend up and down California mostly putting extra miles on our leased vehicles.  During long holiday weekends we’d request time-off from our 9 to 5 jobs and work three or more gigs in different time zones.  We’d bunk two, sometimes three in a room, depending on how much leverage JAIME, our Boss, had.  We’d created bonds instantly with certain individuals. Me, with LEO.  LEO with his ‘sista’ HERMOSILLO. HERMOSILLO with his childhood friend, CISCO, and CISCO with his Brotha’s brotha, QWEST.  We all envied and admired the other for having the guts (and the dance moves) to be able to expose themselves in such a way that no inhibitions existed.  More than once I caught myself saying “I wish I was more like him”.

In hotel in Puerto Vallarta. Clockwise from top: Leo, Cisco, me and Hermosillo

Everybody “friended” us on MYSPACE back when it was relevant.  Before TWITTER, we had fans “follow” us to different cities on four-day weekends.  “Friends” bought us nice things, kept our attention, and our glasses full.  Some of us were cunty: HERMOSILLO and QWEST (love you guys!), some of us grateful: LEO and, ahem… ME.  And some occupied the spot in between; CISCO.  I was very much thankful for the extra cash I would earn from a quick feel; just enough to buy me a slice of pizza at the end of a long night’s work.

It was the best feeling!  High on life and the two-drink ticket’s we’d each get from JAIME. We were either drunk or drugged.   Outta our mind, or outta our clothes.  Everybody wanted a piece of us and we were willing to give just for that instant gratification of a new “like”.  I was ready to hit the box, but not before my usual 2 Long Island Ice Teas, a few push-ups, baby oil, and some quick reassurance from a fellow go-go boy regarding the sexiness of a particular ensemble.  Despite the sex-is-in-the-air nature of the business, I never got “aroused” while on stage, but I have fallen off a few times.  While the boys called me “The Praying Mantis”,  a signature move in which I’d perform a head-lock with my legs, on whomever was tipping me – then I’d push him away once I felt he had had enough – the rule was, whatever happened backstage, stayed backstage.

In Puerto Vallarta, MX. Left to right: Leo, Qwest, Hermosillo, Cisco and myself

Looking at that footage I found on CISCO’S Youtube page, I saw another me.  One, kinda like when you’re bestfriend is in a talent show and the “talent” consists of singing, and you’re just like, really expecting the worse.  Thats what I expected.  Instead, I got home and told GLENN about my blast from the past.  I also added the disclaimer that he please excuse me from what I was about to say, but that I kinda liked the guy I saw.

I saw a young guy who was a little lost but fearless and just wanting some attention. Driven and ambitious.  Struggling, yet maintaining a “cool” image.  After all, I was an exclusive member of this exciting fraternity where we all just wanted to have fun, feel sexy and live life – and occasionally  experience something similar to those “initiations” you always hear about but never had the opportunity to attend.  Many auditioned, and we each made bets on how many times we’d think he’d slept with the BOSS, but few could keep up.  We “performed” as far as MIAMI with frequent gigs in TEXAS, ARIZONA, CHICAGO and PUERTO VALLARTA. Some  of us had booty in different cities of the GOLDEN STATE, all the way from THE BAY, to just right above T.J.  Other’s kept their boyfriends on speed-dial. Regardless of all the memories, good and bad, that particular moment in life is one I cannot see myself recreating.  I’m glad I stopped while I was ahead and survived.  I can now cross that off my bucket list.

Special thanks to CISCO for the videos below and keeping those memories alive.


QWEST’S FB FAN PAGE:  www.facebook.com/pages/Official-Michael-Silas-Fan-Page/135089756504519?ref=ts

QWEST’S TWITTER: https://twitter.com/#!/Msilas23

CISCO’S BOYZ FB PAGE:  www.facebook.com/ciscosboyz

CISCO’S TWITTER:  https://twitter.com/#!/YOCISCO

LEO’S FB PAGE:  www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=1278710102&ref=ts

DANIEL HERMOSILLO’S FB PAGE:  http://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100000280695562&ref=ts

“Love Dance” by Glenn Douglas Packard

•October 31, 2011 • 1 Comment

Ladies and gentelmen, with no further ado, I present to you….


Rihanna Doll: “We Found Love” Video

•October 25, 2011 • 1 Comment

My version of my current favorite music video.  Rihanna’s “We Found Love” featuring Calvin Harris.

Daniel does L.L.

•September 14, 2011 • Leave a Comment

I’ve always wanted to perform this song on karaoke night.  See why I’m glad I never did…


Beyonce’s On Top with “Love On Top”

•August 29, 2011 • 2 Comments

One of my favorite parts of last night’s VMA’s was Beyonce’s performance of “Love On Top”.  So much so that I woke up with the urge to pull out my sewing kit and try to replicate it myself. Every time I’d reference back to the video footage as I was creating the doll, I couldn’t help but smile.  She was so obviously feeling on top of the world and was glowing the entire time due to the news of her pregnancy!

Also, it’s my homage to Dolce&Gabbana whom are the designers of Bey’s sequined blazer.  AND Jay-Z’s expression at the end is priceless!  Oh! And did I mention I use my Iphone camera for the shoots? =D